So I've been thinking about my life a lot lately and how much God's changed me.
I've been saved for about 4 years now i grew up in church so i knew all the right things to do and how to play the church games. And growing up i always felt like i was being sheltered from this world like there was so much more out there for me to experience.
So as i got into middle school my curiosity got bigger and eventually i fell for things of this world,i didn't realize how much of an impact it had on me till i had to have my parents come to school and have a serious talk with my teacher.. i know i know doesn't sound bad at all lol but for me it was a big deal because i was always that sweet girl that nobody thought would ever dare talk back or disobey. But i mean how can you be all that and fit in right?
Well little did i know is that it doesn't always get you the best of friends. As i got into high school things changed a little but i wasn't so curious and decided to put my focus on God but my life took a little turn, in the worst possible way you could ever imagine it taking. I had something taken from me that could never be replaced. Something i pray would of never existed in this cruel dark world. Something that took all my joy and happiness away.i was so miserable and started cutting myself, making myself throw up, and crying myself to sleep every night terrified of what could happen. Nightmare after nightmare. Still fighting myself to this day!!
But i will always remember that moment in a local raleys store in the bathroom i cried my eyeballs out in the corner of the bathroom asking God why did this have to happen to me what is the point of me living i was to the point of suicide and God intervened and took that big burden off my shoulders and took all the pain away.God completely set me free it was then that i realized how much Love one man had for me despite all the pain i put God through despite how many times i failed him. I just couldn't believe that God would be so willing to take it all and give me my joy back.
It's always hard to share personal stories like these but it's been on my heart to just let it out, and somehow be there for people who have gone through the same thing.there's hope when there seems to be none.God loves each and everyone of you just for who you are and he will always be there for you no matter what that's the beauty of salvation. It so worth it. It's not easy but worth it.
This life has absolutey nothing to offer you only God has what your soul truly needs.